Monday, March 7, 2016

Sorry Men!

Let's talk husband bashing, shall we?  It happens.  Sorry men.
Sometimes it is just venting.  Sometimes a woman can only take so much of a husband's tushy being stuck to the couch, or only so much temporary blindness as you pass by a sink full of dishes or a pile of laundry.  For these things, you men shouldn't feel too bad about women venting to each other; it keeps us from smothering you with a pillow as you sleep.
Sometimes though, this talk crosses a line.  Sometimes it builds in to just flat out complaining.  I've been guilty of this myself from time to time.  The difference that I've noticed is not visible.  It's somewhere inside me when I no longer feel relief from venting some pent up aggressions, but I start feeling mean.  Everyone has flaws.  And I don't want to turn in to a bully about my husband's flaws.
I hate that feeling.  I am the wife.  I should have his back, not turn on him whenever the chance presents itself.
The good news is that I've found one sure fire way to turn these bad feeling around.  When I start feeling like my husband's biggest critic, I look at how far he's come.  I can turn in to his biggest fan faster than Street Outlaw's best car can go 0 to 60.
Even without considering growth, it is important to remind myself that some of the things that drive me crazy about my other half are some of the things that make him the perfect other half for me.  This man can block from his head any thoughts that upset him, while I can play the what-if game until my eyes are crossed. He calms my thoughts.  I flutter around from idea to idea and task to task like a feather in the wind some days; while this man does one thing until it's done, then he moves to the next.  He grounds me.  I can push myself 22 hours a day to go, go, go.  This guy next to me on the couch rests.  He reminds me to rest.
Tonight I am regretful of the times when I've crossed from venting to bashing - I'm sorry!  Tonight I am thankful for the growth we have both experienced together.  And I am thankful for the things that are different about us that make us fit together so well.

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