Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Role of a Woman

I've always had a problem when people infer, or just flat out tell me, that I should do something "because I'm a woman".  It started with "because you're a girl".  And ya know, as I've aged, so have the expectations.
There are things that, as a woman, are logically different than a man.  I had the children.  The hubster couldn't do that.  I have one more article of undergarments that I put on every day.  And I see a special doctor once a year to check on my health.  These things make sense.
Things that don't make sense are things like when I was told I should be afraid to go out by myself to places.  I was told I should leave the heavy lifting to the boys.  It was inferred that I should be less of myself so that a man could feel more like a man.  I was told to sit in a meeting and not talk, but to tell my male boss my thoughts after the meeting.  I was told to fill the drinks in a meeting with all men because I was the female.  Nope, these things don't make sense to me.  Why?
Why couldn't I go out by myself?  I can fight.  Better than most actually.  And I am a pretty good shot when I have a gun.  Lift heavy things?  I can do that too.  Sometimes it is brawn, sometimes it is brain.  Point A to Point B with something heavy can be done a few different ways.  Be less of myself?  Because someone else isn't as much of themselves?  Um . . No!  Sit in a meeting and not talk?  Really?  Then why would I attend?  If I'm there, I'm talking.  Period.  I may fill drinks once to be nice.  But I expect the men to do the same when my glass is empty.
Feminist?  I really don't label myself as anything but logical.  These other ideas simply don't make sense to me, so I won't live by them.
Guess what?  I'm raising my kids the same way.  My girls won't wait to be saved by a knight on a white horse.  And my boys won't be looking for a damsel in distress to save.  I pray that all my children grow up, and if they fall in love; that they fall in love with someone who will be their partner in life, equally.  Of course any good partnership is made up of two parties with differing strengths.  And that is to be expected.  But I pray that they will have someone to be their friend as well as their love, supporting each other always.  And yes, we talk about that already.  They aren't told that they have to get married.  Some people don't.  But I hope that if they do decide they want to share their lives with someone, that they choose wisely.  God gave us a heart and a mind.  We talk about using both.
We talk about it now.  We talk about respect.  We talk about honesty.  We talk about accountability.  And I pray they remember these talks as they grow and make their life decisions.
Tonight I am thankful for a chance to talk to my kids, to build them up, and to have them learn and remember that men and women, although inherently different, should always walk side by side.

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