Thursday, May 11, 2017

Made It

Two months ago I bought a ticket for a convention.  I was so excited.  I was planning on leaving early in the morning, driving the 3 1/2 hours to the convention, and drive back later that night.  The hubster thought I was crazy.
Then I got upgraded to a VIP ticket.  So I booked a hotel.  I now had to be there a bit earlier if I wanted to take advantage of the VIP stuff.
I was going to leave for the hotel after the kids got home from school.  I haven't left overnight by myself in 6 years.  None of the kids like it too much.  It is especially hardest on the two youngest though.
Somewhere in the past couple weeks I gave myself permission to relax.  My plans changed to leave after I dropped the kids at school.  Then I could drive down, check in to the hotel, and have hours of unscheduled time.  I had all sorts of plans.  I was going to take a nap.  I was going to read some books that have been waiting for me.  I was going to brainstorm.  I was going to write.  I was going to do all of these things.  It sounded like a dream.
Last night the hubster came inside the house and said that my tire was completely flat.  He tried to put air in to it.  The air was going out as fast as he was putting it in.  He found quite a large hole.  I get holes regularly . . drawback of going to foreclosed, trashy houses.  We can work around that.
Then this morning.  *sigh*  This morning my son told me about a woman that came to the school to talk to him yesterday.  I knew what was going on.  I guess she tried to come visit me yesterday at the house, but I wasn't home.  I tried to assure the kids that everything was ok.  Of course it would be, I accidentally scratched my son.  That was all.
But I tell ya, it's upsetting.  It's upsetting that someone would accuse me of purposely hurting my child.  It's upsetting to think that someone thinks I am capable of that.  I got mad.  Really mad.  I got sad.  Really sad.  I cried.  Like big, huge sobs.  I haven't cried that hard in a long time.  This week has been so stressful to get work and home all set up for me to be able to leave and have some relaxing time and convention time.  Everything just erupted and came pouring out of my eyeballs.
Then I called the lady.  We met and talked.  And of course she can see that it was an accident.  Because it was an accident.  I know that.  My son knows that.  The CPS lady knows that.
Well, the kids were at school when I talked with her.  And I just couldn't leave the state with the kids not knowing was was going on.  So I stayed until they got home from school.  I could see their faces when I told them that everything was absolutely going to be fine because I talked to the woman.  I felt better seeing their faces look calm and reassured.
Then I took off to my hotel,  I got here by the kids' bedtime.  I'll get a whole day of rest when I retire maybe someday.  I have been fighting all day to keep a good perspective on this.
Tonight I am thankful that the truth is easy to see here.  I am thankful for a kind, caring person to deal with in this matter.  I am thankful for a vehicle with four good tires.  I am thankful for getting to my hotel with at least enough time to sleep well tonight before my event tomorrow.  And I am thankful that despite all the hurdles in the way, I am here.  Tomorrow will be good.  There will be invaluable information and great discussions.  And then I will be home to hug my babies.

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