Monday, May 29, 2017

Shaken

S-T-R-E-S-S
For the past two weeks, I have tried and tried to get away from that horrible word.  A little over two weeks ago, I was supposed to have an entire day all to myself.  I was so excited to get away, unplug, re-energize, and brainstorm.  Instead, I spent that morning talking to a state worker and racking my brain at who could possibly think I was a monster.
Since then, I have found out enough to keep my brain half crazy.  It's been a busy work time.  It's been a busy end-of-school-year kid time.  It's been a time filled with some hard social things for the kids.  I've been working slower, sleeping less, and eating worse.
This Saturday, Sunday, and today I did not set a morning alarm.  That has been wonderful.  It really has.  But, I've also been working every single day for many hours.
I'm still not caught up with work.  I'm close.  But I'm going to go to bed soon.  So it won't be tonight either.
I was sitting here today feeling all together unhappy with how I've been lately.  I generally handle stress fairly well . . I think anyway.  But this has been hard.
Tomorrow I'm making some small changes.  Tonight I will sleep enough.  Tomorrow I will get up and do a little exercise.  Tomorrow I will eat a healthy breakfast.  Tomorrow I will remind myself over and over and over again to "Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7.  or . . even better right now "Cast your burden upon the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken."  Psalm 55:22.  Shaken . . yes, I've been shaken.  I've allowed 2-3 people's accusations to shake me.  It's time to let that go.  I'm not even sure at this point if it is the accusation itself that shook me, or the fact that I trusted these people too much.  Ok, Bingo, even typing that . . the accusation was bad enough.  The fact that I trusted these people was what took this whole thing up a few levels.  Time to let go.  Time to forgive.  Time to just back away and respect these new boundaries.
Tomorrow I will work hard, as I have another busy week ahead.  But getting caught up on work is within reach now.  Tomorrow I will pray for my kids as they head off to handle another day at school with all sorts of situations.  Tomorrow I will remember to take a minute to breathe and be thankful that there are only two more weeks of school and we can all relax a little.  Tomorrow is full of possibilities . . . Tomorrow . . .
Tonight I am thankful for another chance tomorrow to move back in to a healthy place physically, emotionally, and mentally.  Tonight I am thankful for a good weekend moving me a little farther and farther away from stress.  Tonight I am thankful to even have these problems to stress about because today is a day to be thankful for those gave their lives so that we can go about ours.
And nothing to do with this blog; but I am also thankful that I finally got new chicks today :)


Sunday, May 28, 2017

More Than a Parade

**Sorry, it's kind of short tonight.  I'm sleepy!!
Tomorrow, Ethos Real Estate West will be driving in a parade!  This is my first time with such an event.  I think I'm ready . . .
In the morning, we're going to wash and wax the truck.  I have decorations to put on.  I have signs.  I have candy to throw.  I have my nifty "Ethos" shirt.  Check, check, check, etc.!
Tonight I am thankful and excited for tomorrow's parade!  I don't want to diminish the importance of Memorial Day at all.  Since I'm going to be in the parade though, I'm glad I'm ready!  But, I must say that I know there is much more about tomorrow than just a parade!  I've been seeing numbers today of the number of lives lost in different wars.  It doesn't matter how many times I see those numbers, they always catch me off guard.  And I am forever grateful for those who gave their lives so that we can be free.

Saturday, May 27, 2017

One Down

This morning I slept in until 7:30!  Ok, so that may not seem like a lot to some.  But, I went to sleep last night around 9:30.  Doesn't that sound much more amazing now?  Hmmm???  10 whole hours of sleep!
YES, my plan of sleeping is going swimmingly!  I don't know how it will go tomorrow.  We have a little more planned for tomorrow.  So hopefully I can sleep in again.   I am tired now for sure!
Tonight I had a wonderful time at a wedding, drank a bit of alcohol, and am ready for bed!
So tonight I am thankful for a wonderful evening.  And thankful for another night of going to be without setting an alarm in the morning!

Friday, May 26, 2017

Public Sleeping

"What are your Memorial Weekend plans?"  I've been asked that a few times this week.
The first time I answered a little quietly, "staying home".  "Maybe working on the yard".  Then I put a little thought in to it.  And I changed my answer, "sleeping".  :)
That made me happy . . just the thought of it.  This weekend I am going to sleep!  For three mornings, I will not set an alarm!  :) :)
I think I've been handling the stress of the last couple week very well.  But my body begs to differ.  I have been so tired.  I fell asleep yesterday at the dentist office while the kids were getting their teeth cleaned.  In my defense, they have a very comfy loveseat with lots of pillows in the toy waiting room.  I was sitting in there with the boys while the girls got their teeth cleaned.  When I woke up, I looked at the time.  I had been sleeping for around 12 minutes . . . in public . . . . Public Sleeping!  I asked Sammy if I was snoring.  He said not really.  So, we went over the rule that if mom is ever snoring in public, please wake her up!
So yes, tonight I am thankful that my Memorial Weekend plans do NOT include camping, or big parties, or traveling for hours.  I am thankful that my Memorial Weekend plans include Sleeping!  It sounds heavenly :)  I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend, no matter what your plans are!

Thursday, May 25, 2017

When He Reads

I don't have as many years experience as a parent as some people out there.  But from my experience, I can tell you that I learn something new about my kids almost every day.
Both of my boys took a little longer to start talking when they were little.  And both of my boys did not pronounce letter sounds correctly.  With my older son, we worked and worked at it.  By the time he started school, he spoke correctly.  With my younger son, I missed the mark.  I didn't carve out that time to work with him.  And he started school not pronouncing some letters correctly.  I wish I would have made the time back then.
The school worked with him.  And he is now, at the end of 3rd grade, pronouncing his letters all correctly.  That is wonderful!
I noticed last year that his reading was suffering because of his speech.  The letters on the page were not the sounds that he heard for the words.  He didn't just speak the letter sounds incorrectly, he comprehended them incorrectly.  That would make reading very difficult.  If he says "woad" for "road" - well that is one thing.  But if he actually thinks that the word is "woad" . . well then reading the word "road" wouldn't really click as the thing the cars drive on.  And of course with reading, there is also writing.  Yep . . .
He hasn't wanted to try in these areas at all.  And I get it.  I really do.  He is a very smart boy.  And these things make him feel dumb.  He takes longer than the other kids.  And that frustrates him.
So, he and I had a heart to heart talk about this.  We talked about why he isn't trying.  We talked about why he isn't "getting it", like the other kids.  And we worked out a plan!
This summer's Mom School already has a curriculum!  In years past, I start looking at Mom School after several weeks of summer vacation.  But this summer, oh this summer we have a big task ahead of us!  My boy wants to be up to par with the other kids in his class.  And he is very much capable of this goal!
Step #1, we are taking a step back.  We aren't going to worry about the mechanics of reading and writing at this point.  There is no use dissecting something that isn't functioning correctly anyway.  It'd be like greasing the bearings on a flat tire.  We're going to fix the tire first.  We're going to make the words make sense.  Then we'll move on.
It is awesome to watch him already!  Just breaking this down to the root of the problem and setting up a game plan to work on it has made him feel empowered!  That was visible tonight when he WILLINGLY read to me while we drove home.  It was just he and I in the car.  It was quiet and safe.  And he read me a story out loud from cover to cover.  It was wonderful!
Tonight I am thankful for a plan!  Mom School starts early this year!  Let's Go!



Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Every Moment

I had a 9am appointment this morning.  A man opened the door.  I walked in and a little girl ran up to me who proudly proclaimed, "I Used The POTTY!".  I congratulated her and told her what a good job that was!
Upstairs I had to peak quietly in to a bedroom because the baby was sleeping.  I opened the door and a pair of blue eyes stared at me.  I smiled and waved and backed out slowly.
I remember those days well.  It makes my heart happy to think of my babies when they were babies.
I am very thankful for who they are now!  I love watching them grow and become their own people!  And I do NOT want to go back to diaper days.  But sometimes, some random stranger children take me back to the innocent days when my babies stayed with me all day long.  There was no outside world trying to force them to grow up faster than they were ready for.  There was no one talking about the news or the evils of the world.  There were just smiles and laughs; with the celebration of little things, like using the potty.
Tonight I am thankful that my children all use the potty quite well by themselves!  I want to reiterate that I am very content with where we are now in life!  I am thankful for where we are now as a family!  These kids have worked hard to be who they are today!  And I couldn't be more proud or more thankful!  I am also thankful for all the memories we've made as a family!  Every stage of life is precious and will live in my heart forever. :)



Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Unclear

I heard a new saying a couple weeks ago that keeps going thru my head.  "To be unclear is to be unkind."  
This really resonates with me.  I try to be very honest and forthcoming in my day to day communications.  But I can have problems when I am having issues with someone else.  I tend to have a hard time having a conversation with someone and pointing out a specific problem I am having with that person. 
Sometimes I do ok.  There have been several times when I get myself upset.  When I get a little mad, I can get over my reservations that I may be hurting some one's feelings.  
I have never viewed hurting some one's feelings in a kind light.  But it really depends on how you look at it.  If I am not setting out to hurt some one's feelings; and I am trying my best to be compassionate in conversation; then I really should not feel responsible for the other person's feelings.  But I tend to.
Now looking at the same situation in this new light, "To be unclear is to be unkind."  Well, that's true.  To beat around the bush just encourages confusion and possibly untrue conclusions.  And that is not kind.  It is much more kind to lovingly and politely be direct and clear about issues so they can be resolved; or worked thru.
Tonight I am thankful for these words.  They aren't complicated words.  But their truth is ringing loud in my head.  I may paint these words on my wall some day.  I don't need to get mad to have enough courage to bring up issue with another; I can remember that I need to be clear about the issue, and subsequently be kind enough to have honest communication that leaves little room for confusion or distraction.