Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Right Where

We are all human.  We all have moments where we question what we are doing and why we are doing it.  If we don't have a good "why"; then we have trouble with life.  People are meant to have a purpose.
Right now, my "why" is changing.  It's shifting from being behind to planning ahead.  On the surface, we weren't behind on anything really.  Rediscovering truths about debt shined a light on the fact that we were in fact behind.  We weren't free to do as we pleased because "the borrower is servant to the lender".  We are working on the house next.  And while we work on that, life is shifting.  So much is shifting.
It looks like nothing on the surface.  This isn't the shifting change that is visible like when a tide changes and the waves show the new direction.  This is a shift inside us.  It is empowering and freeing.  And at times, a little scary.  When you in the chains of debt, you know where you are going - you are going to work and you are paying your bills. Or else you are going to be in a world of trouble.  When those chains are gone, you have a whole world open up.  Where to go now?  So many ideas!  The excitement peaks and ebbs.  And it takes time.  I'll be awhile because I get rather stuck in patterns of work, work, work!  Especially now because I have so many plans that are to change so much!  There is so much to do!
I look at my family, and it isn't just me.  They are ready for new and exciting things too!  We've been on this journey together!  And we are ready for the next adventure together!
Two steps forward and one step back sometimes.  Or so it seems.  I get rather impatient with this in between stuff sometimes.  I try to keep in mind that this in between stuff is a very important part of life!
Then there are moments like today when I am reminded that we are right where we need to be.  If we had skipped over this journey or if we were to skip this in between stuff right now; we would be lacking because of it.  I'm watching my daughter, who made a very responsible, very mature decision, deal with the stress of standing up to questions about her decisions.  And she is rocking it.  It is wearing her down a bit.  But she's doing amazing!  I am so proud!
We are all where we need to be to learn to be strong and steadfast, faithful that God is always with us and there to help even when we do mess up in life!
Tonight I am thankful for the journey of life, yes.  Tonight though, especially for our recent journey.  We are all learning and growing as a family.  And that is invaluable!

Visitor!

We have a visitor.
The kids love when Uncle Bill comes to visit!!
Tonight's blog is short because it's late and I've been up chatting.
Tonight I am thankful that Bill is here to visit!  The kids are thankful too!

Sunday, April 23, 2017

What a Night!

It was several weeks ago now that I first saw a thing online for a dance show at the Fox Theater.  I thought it would be great to surprise the girls with!
I couldn't wait.  I told them about it the day that I ordered the tickets.  I was so excited to take them!  The girls have never been to Detroit, let alone the Fox theater.  I've taken the boys to Tiger's games and to see the Lions play.  So this was extra exciting that it would be the girls' first time to such a big city!
It was a fun drive there, listening to the girls as they took in all the city sights!  The show was wonderful!  The theater amazing, of course!  The drive home was a blast, listening to the girls laugh and joke with each other!
Tonight I am thankful for a wonderful night with my girls!  This is a night that I'm sure they'll remember for a lifetime :)  And the girls were very happy that we didn't get mugged ;)


Saturday, April 22, 2017

Worth the Wait

My youngest child is not known for his patience.
10 seconds seems like 10 hours to him.
Last weekend he received a birthday gift of a gift card to Toys R Us.  It has been driving him absolutely crazy that he hasn't been able to use it yet.
He's gotten online and picked out things a couple times.  But he kept changing his mind.  Today, a week later, the boy finally got to go to Toys R Us!
He made a beeline to the Skylanders.  "This way mom!"  He didn't want to stop and look at anything else.  He even walked by the Pokemon cards.  He did give them a half second stare on his way past.
When we walked up to the Skylanders, he was so excited to find that they were on sale!  Up to $10 off some Skylanders!
Tonight I am thankful for a good sale at Toys R US.  This sale made his long wait much more worth it to spend his gift card and get another extra Skylander!!



Friday, April 21, 2017

Unwinding

I have officially given this week everything that I have!
I called it a day a bit early today and escaped to a nice hot tub with wonderful Epsom salts!  The problem with doing that too early in the day is that I had to get out and put on real clothes and still do stuff.  I prefer to leave a nice, relaxing bath, put on pj's and go to bed!  :)  I'm even thinking about a second bath; from which I can go right to bed this time!!
After the first bath and the putting on of real clothes, there was a little dance party here in my office.  Two of my kiddos came in; we turned the music up and had some fun :)
Tonight I am thankful for unwinding a bit tonight!  I'm glad for a lot of good progress this week!  And I am thankful that tomorrow morning this house is sleeping in!!!



Thursday, April 20, 2017

The Big Day!

Tomorrow is the big day!
Let me digress for a minute.
Last year I worked like crazy with a huge goal in mind to become debt free!  And we did it!  This year I wanted to work less.
I worked less for about two months.
Then we've had some ongoing tenant/rental home issues.  We have more repairs to do to our own house.  There are just these big ticket items staring at us that make me cringe at the thought of working so much again.  But it seems almost necessary.  But I won't do it.
There had to be a better way.
I'm working on it.
I found two major overhauls to my current system.  And time just seems to be dragging to get them implemented!!  One overhaul is with a start-up company.  They have a wonderful product.  But they do not have the staff to keep up with their demand.  Once I realized this, I've been calling them regularly.  I'm being polite.  But I'm keeping myself at the top of their list!
I started this quarter of 2017 with specific goals for business improvement and I intend on hitting them!
Tomorrow, over a breakfast meeting I will roll out the new systems to my gal who keeps me from going crazy with all this work!  We're going to get this thing down pat soon!  And I'll keep looking still for ways to improve!
So far I've had to delay this meeting twice now.  Two weeks have gone by waiting for a break in work and waiting for the new systems to be in place.  Two weeks of working my butt off knowing that it should be easier if the new systems were in place.  Two weeks of begrudgingly trying hard, wishing for a break in time enough to make improvements.  Two Weeks Ends Tomorrow!
Tonight I am thankful that tomorrow is the day!  I know there may be some hiccups still.  I'm not expecting perfection.  But I'm looking forward to improvement and efficiency for sure!

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Apologizing for My Temper

Here's something you may or may not know about me:  I can have a bit of a temper.  I sometimes have to apologize for this temper because I can be really blunt and snarky.
About a week ago I got very mad at someone I've known for a long time.  The truth of the matter is that I know we aren't the same level mentally.  I've known this for some time.  Perception of a situation can make or break relationships in life.
I guess I just didn't know exactly how far apart we really were from eye to eye.  We are more like eye to foot.  And there are some topics that I just plain get touchy about.  I am human.
This person hasn't taken my calls for a long time now.  He doesn't reply to messages.  But the few times I've seen him in person the last few years, he has seemed genuinely happy to see me.
Well when I got mad, I figured a text would be the way to go.  I figured I'd lose my cool if I called and he happened to answer this time.  So I wrote and deleted; wrote and deleted; wrote and deleted.  Finally I was ok with what I wrote.  It was to the point, honest, and void of any phrases that tend to slip out of my mouth when I morph in to angry-Jessie, the sailor-mouthed, fire breathing dragon.
Nothing.  No response.
Was he even getting my messages?
Yep.
I got one sign.  The message went thru.
No response.
I have spent the last week or so continually bringing myself back to prayer.  I can not fix this.  I can not do anything but pray.  So I have been.  I even wrote his name down.  So when I get mad or sad or think of him at all, I will remember to pray for him.
Today was the day to make things right.  I sent another text today.  I apologized for being mean.  I didn't bring up the past.  The past is the past.  It would be wonderful to reach some place where he understands my side and I understand his side.  But it isn't going to happen.  So I just reminded him that I love him.  That's all I can offer, love.
I haven't heard back.
I doubt I will.
But tonight I will sleep good.  I didn't leave things as they were.  I've done all I can do.  Tonight I'll pray for him.  Tomorrow I'll pray for him.  That is all I can do now.
Tonight I am thankful for laying this to rest.  I haven't been at peace since I sent that last message.  Now, I've found peace.  I hope he can find peace also.  I'm praying for that.